Book: Sex Snob
Author: Elizabeth Hayley
Genre: Romantic Comedy
Expected Release Date: November 21, 2013
Cover Design by: Raina Campbell @ Grapevine Book Tours
Twenty-nine year old wild, carefree, and brutally sarcastic Amanda Bishop thought her three rules for dating would weed out unworthy suitors. And they did. Until she met Shane Reed, her smart-ass, sexy-as-sin CrossFit coach who pushes all her buttons. He’s the man she loves to hate. But when the hate begins to ebb away, and is replaced by feelings she can’t handle, Amanda hides behind her rules. Will the electric chemistry she feels with Shane allow her to get beyond a painful past, or will she push him away with her rules? Rules that make her the ultimate Sex Snob.
** Sex Snob is a spin-off of Pieces of Perfect but can be read as a stand-alone novel. **
Shane checked us in and got me a waiver and rented climbing gear—though I insisted on paying my own way since this wasn’t a date. “I still can’t believe you brought your own equipment,” I said. “You’re such a nerd.”
His eyes bored into me with complete seriousness. This wasn’t just a game to him. “We’ll see who the nerd is when we hit the wall. Now sign the waiver and let’s get going.”
“Calm down, Mr. Bossy. I have to read it first.” Shane waited while I looked it over. He didn’t need to fill one out because the loser already belonged to the club. “What’s all this about rope burns and falling off the wall?”
“It just says if you die or whatever, they aren’t liable. Trust me,” he said as he leaned in to my ear and lowered his voice a bit. “I have a lot of experience with ropes, and I’ve never given anyone any abrasions.”
My head shot over to look at him curiously. Is he serious? His expression revealed nothing. I quickly signed the waiver and handed it to the husky gray-haired woman at the counter.
“Okay, your instructor’s right over there.” She pointed to a group of about ten people who were huddled in one corner of the gym. “You’re the last two in that group.”
“Thanks,” Shane replied politely, grabbing our equipment and turning toward the group.
“Why do I need an instructor? You can teach me, can’t you?”
“It’s just a liability thing. You have to get properly trained by the employees. Plus, I already have to tell you how to do things correctly when I’m getting paid for it. What makes you think I wanna correct everything you do wrong in my free time, too?”
I shook my head as he laughed at his own joke. “You think you’re pretty funny, don’t you?”
“I try,” he shrugged.
It seemed like our group had been waiting for us because as soon as we arrived, the instructor began. “Okay, my name’s Rain.” Of course it is. Rain was a girl who looked to be in her early twenties. She couldn’t have been more than 5’2”, and she was sporting knee length men’s cargo shorts with a large gray T-shirt. Her pasty complexion was framed by dirty blonde dreadlocks that she had tied back in a ponytail with an industrial rubber band. “I’ll be your instructor for today. It looks like we’re all here, so let’s get started.”
It was only when she said the last sentence that I heard it. Sometimes, when her tongue hit her retainer in just the right way, her S’s sounded like TH’s. I guess the commune where Rain had been raised didn’t have access to a good orthodontist, so she was forced to get braces as an adult. Poor girl. It was her one attempt at caring about her appearance.
“I’m gonna go over some rules with you first. Climbing ith not . . . I repeat ith not a game,” she spat sternly in a voice that was much too deep for her small stature. If it weren’t for her lisp, I would have been a little scared of her. She clearly took her job seriously and wasn’t in the mood for any nonsense.
I leaned over to Shane. “You hear that, Thane? No mething around.” I over enunciated the “TH” sound as I said his name.
Shane did his best to keep a straight face while he looked ahead.
“The first rule of climbing is to trust your feet,” Rain continued. “You’ll hear me thay that a lot to you while you’re on the wall. “Trust your feet!” she yelled sharply, making me jump. “Rock climbing is a vertical dance that requires focus. And concentration.” She emphasized the last part to make her point.
“You hear that, Amanda?” Shane didn’t avert his gaze from Rain as he whispered under his breath. “A vertical dance. Most of your experience is of the more horizontal nature, isn’t it?”
Okay, I’ll give credit where credit’s due. That was a good one.
Rain’s eyes darted toward us to keep us in line. She must have had a sixth sense for goofing around. “Climbing is a fantastic workout for your whole body. It forces you to use muscles most people don’t make use of on a regular basis, like your wrists, forearmth, and fingers.”
Ha. “Well, that explains why you’re so fucking good at it. You could probably free scale Mt. Rushmore with all the jerking off you probably do.” I couldn’t hide my smile. I was clearly too pleased with myself. “Now you can even claim it’s part of your workout routine.” I didn’t look over at Shane because I knew I wouldn’t be able to control my laughter when I saw his face, and Rain would have my head on a stick.
Elizabeth Hayley is actually “Elizabeth” and “Hayley,” two friends who love reading romance novels to obsessive levels. This mutual love prompted them to put their English degrees to good use by penning their own. The product is Pieces of Perfect, their debut novel. They learned a ton about one another through the process, like how they clearly share a brain and have a persistent need to text each other constantly (much to their husbands’ chagrin). They are currently getting ready to release Sex Snob, a novel centered around Lily’s roommate Amanda, and have also begun writing the sequel to Pieces of Perfect.
“Elizabeth” lives with her husband, one and a half year old daughter and nutjob of a dog. “Hayley” lives with her husband and her own crazy dog. They are about to adopt a newborn son in November. Elizabeth Hayley’s writing motto is best captured by the words of Patrick Dennis: “I always start with a clean piece of paper and a dirty mind.”
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